Wow. Nearly a year later, and I feel inspired to revisit this, but let’s catch up first.

July 31^st, 2025, I quit my job. Three weeks in and I still don’t think it’s hit me yet. That shift I talked about last year, it never stopped. Life just kept on shifting. God kept on making moves in our lives that led me here. Deciding to leave a career that I could have kept pursuing and moving up in was a lot. Seven years with one company and working full-time since 2014, and now staying home working a different kind of full-time.

Three weeks in and here are a few nuggets that I wanted to share.

1. The monetary piece is huge and hasn’t quite hit me yet. Kind of like the first time I took beef liver supplements, and they didn’t all quite go down right. It feels like I’m still burping that up. Not fun, but also, I know it’s good for me. God is good, and honestly, taking that off my shoulders and handing that responsibility over to my husband has been the easiest part, but still something to get used to. I will still do the budgeting because I’m a nerd and love it.
2. The routine. This is the hardest one for me. Not just my routine, but the routine for my 3 young children who have always had a routine. Navigating this has been interesting so far. I am giving myself A LOT of grace because I know I am just getting started and feeling around the situation. I keep thinking that my vacation is ending soon, and this isn’t an indefinite thing. That is slowly going away, and I’m writing more things down. That has been helpful. Also, I kept everything on my work calendar, and now that it’s gone, I’m a little lost. I have a physical planner and wall calendar to help me out, but I still must remember to use them.
3. Self-induced pressure. Something I have ALWAYS struggled with is putting pressure on myself. I think there is a healthy amount of pressure, but then there is a pressure where literally no one else cares, but you feel like if you don’t reach certain expectations, then you are a complete failure. But the expectations are your own and founded in lies and a lack of self-worth. Truly not trying to go deep, but I’ve been over this with my wonderful counselor and it’s something that I constantly work through. I add this because I have a need for perfection. If my home and space isn’t where I think it should be (which tends to turn into unrealistic goals of everything being clean and tidy all the time- I have 3 kids 4 and under), then I start spiraling. I can see this infiltrating when we homeschool so I am working on developing tools for myself to work through these intrusive thoughts.

Additional insights.

At first, I thought I would be writing to women who were working the homestead and a corporate job. But I quickly found that I was spiraling and felt like God was moving me away from corporate America through many signs. This time last year I was pleading with God and my husband to get me home. I felt God kept showing me my path but wasn’t creating a way to get there and my husband kept saying wait. I am not good at waiting. Something about me is that I am not money-motivated. I was ready to give everything away and live in a one-bedroom cabin on the prairie or in the woods if that meant I could be home with my babies, garden, and chickens. My discernment was lacking, and I wasn’t being partner-focused with my husband. What I noticed this year is the amazing friendships and connections I made through my job and community that I likely would have missed out on but also solidified where my heart is.

I was great at my job (in my head anyways), and when I became a manager, and now my employees were on the line due to decisions I was making, my world turned on its head. In a good and bad way. When I became a manager, I knew I couldn’t be a good manager and uphold what I felt was in the best interest of the company without sacrificing my personal values. I know what is good for a company, but that is an inanimate object to me, and I will always do what is best for the people. Some would say I probably wasn’t cut out to make tough people decisions, and that is true. And I do NOT feel bad about that. It’s pressure I can’t handle, so I made the decision that I knew I could stand by. I may feel different one day, but that’s not today.  So, it wasn’t for me, and the logistics of travel time and a boo-koo of other things were not lining up with my husband’s or my schedule.  The company was beyond amazing to me, and the people will always be a part of my makeup. I am so changed by the growth and opportunities. I truly loved it, but my life is changing, and that is a chapter completed.

What is filling my cup today:

1. My kids
2. Baking for The Local Storehouse again (I bake bagels, and they are delicious)
3. Baking in general
4. Being outside
5. Reading the Lord of the Rings (working on Return of the King now)
6. Cooking most everything from scratch
7. Playdates and intentional time with friends
8. Most importantly- spending a ton of more time with Jesus

Blogging.

Consistency in this type of space is not my jam. Clearly. But I do hope to keep writing, and if that means here or elsewhere, so be it. I am not great at posting on social media or getting on it these days. I would love to say I will continue to post, but I am going to practice not putting that pressure on myself. I have nothing to lose or gain from this. I do pray that if someone stumbles across these collections of thoughts that it is not a negative experience and something can be taken from it.

Goals.

I would love to post more about my baking, garden, and urban homesteading. If that is interesting to you, awesome! If you are willing to share tips, even better! Ultimately, this is more for me than anyone else. A journal of sorts and a hope to brighten someone’s day.

“It’s a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don’t keep your feet, there’s no knowing where you might be swept off to.”